Ah, Drake, our old friend. Unbelievably, it’s a case of another week, another number one for the One Dance star, who, eight weeks in, is beginning to feel like that friend that won’t leave your house party even when everyone else left hours ago and they’ve thrown up a few times in the bathtub.
But if the fact that Drake’s having another dance on the number one spot feels like a lot, that’s because it is - this is now the longest an artist has been at the top of the charts for nine whole years, if you can believe it; it hasn’t been since Leona Lewis’ Bleeding Love way back in 2007 that a song has stuck around so long.
I must say, I do like One Dance. I’ve been a low-key, if somewhat reluctant, fan of Drake since circa 2013 - the Hold On, We’re Going Home, Nothing Was The Same years - and Views really isn’t that bad an album, especially when held up against what else is kicking around in the charts. Interestingly though, One Dance’s strengths stem from the parts that aren’t actually him - it’s the samples from UK-singer Kyla’s Do You Mind and Wizkid that makes the song a good listen, rather than Drake’s demands for you to text him back.
Still, Drake could churn out pretty much anything at this point and it would sell records; at least Drake was kind enough to make his dancehall anthem half-decent, so that when it inevitably gets played over and over in clubs all summer we can at least somewhat enjoy it. And there’s something about Drake that I respect as an artist - I get the feeling he knows what he’s doing. The internet started making a bunch of memes about him and he responded with the music video to Hotline Bling, almost five full minutes of him doing the most absurd dad-dancing I’ve ever seen, so that the internet could make a bunch more. He can laugh at himself and attract huge amounts of publicity whilst doing so - what’s not to like?
Still, the chinks in Drake’s seemingly indestructible armour might be beginning to show - Drake’s album Views meanwhile has been toppled off its number one spot by Dangerous Woman, Ariana Grande’s latest musical endeavour (have a look through our review of that here); Justin Timberlake’s single Can’t Stop The Feeling, meanwhile, is still lurking in second place on the UK singles chart and looking like it could nab Drake’s crown any time soon.
For whatever reason, the whole singles charts has just been really stagnant recently - the only notable shake-up this week is Sigma’s new entry, Cry, at No.21, which inexplicably features guest vocals from Take That - possibly one of the most bizarre plot twists the world of musical collaborations has ever seen. It’s already annoying and it’s only been in the charts a week, but I’m guessing it’ll be around quite a few weeks more and it should have jumped a few places higher by this time next week, especially after their confetti-filled performance at Big Weekend on Saturday.
I’m really not a fan of old JT’s Can’t Stop The Feeling, but here’s hoping it - or literally anything else - has overtaken Drake by this time next week, just for the sake of variety (and next week’s column).